SEE ya!!!!

SPOILER ALERT: Dinna read unless you have read chapter 109 in The Fiery Cross. 

I wanted to name this post "The Return of the Prodigal Son" but that would be a spoiler nightmare for those who aren't this far in the series yet....

Oh. My. GOSH. (my kids yell at me when I say "oh my god") I dinna even know WHAT to say. I had texts this morning. Lots of texts. LORDDDD there were texts. And then Jenn M. CALLED. She NEVER calls. We email 47 thousand times a day, but rarely do we CALL. So I knew something was up. She and Shannon BOTH asked me if I had read Chapter 108 and they told me to text or call them the second I did. Tracey sent multiple "Where are you???" emails. So I was more than prepared when Ian showed up in all his Highlander-turned-Mohawk glory to save the day with his bow and arrow. What I was NOT prepared for was chapter 109 when Jamie said those beautiful words; "for good". After my eyes left the "d" in that statement, I put my face in my hands and sobbed quietly to myself (as I was in the car with my family.) My husband looked at me with fear in his eyes, as if to say "What is WRONG?!" but then he realized I was reading and lord knows what look he most likely shot my way. I didn't care. I just sat there with my head down - face covered by my hands - silently sobbing with my head bobbing up and down.

God bless Diana Gabaldon for bringing this wonderful story into all of our lives. She is truly from the heavens.

Feelin' HOT HOT HOT

SPOILER ALERT: Dinna read until you have finished Chapter 107 in The Fiery Cross.

Dear Claire,  

Can't you get Bree to invent air conditioning and maybe some ice pops for you? I mean really. Has she nothing better to do than bake bread and change clouts? Doesn't she know it's dangerous for you to be hanging off window sills whilst fornicating, just to get a little air?!?

Love,

Carol 

PS - Can I borrow Jamie for a few hours? I've got a ceiling fan that needs fixing. :)

My New-and-Improved Outlander Playlists

Have I mentioned lately that I revamped my Outlander playlists? There is now a playlist for each book (up to Drums of Autum as of today) - and each playlist has a list of scene descriptions underneath. I'm always changing/adding to the lists... so they are by no means "finished"!

Starsky and Hutch Indeed

SPOILER ALERT: Dinna read until you have finished Chapter 102 in The Fiery Cross. 

Alright Lassies - I am stuck inside with a major blizzard outside. How awesome is that?? I can blog!

So Jamie, Claire, Roger, Bree, Marsali and the wee ones went off to Wilmington while Fergus went off to file the deeds. And of course the plan was for Jamie and Roger to play Starsky and Hutch (Shannon's description; love it!) and head off to Wylie's Landing for a little pistol-fun with Stephen Bonnet.

Only things went spectacularly wrong - as usual. They got jumped by Lillywhite and Anstruther who were there instead of Bonnet. (Foiled again!)

I always remember Anstruther's name because that is the neatest little town in Scotland that I've been lucky enough to visit. We waited in line for what seemed like hours to get fish-n-chips - and were told they are the best in all of Scotland. If you can confirm or deny, please let me know!

OK so after some roof-hanging... shed-hiding... ocean-swimming... Russian family acquaintance-making... and  marsh-crawling,  Jamie and Roger found each other again. They found Wylie (who had mysteriously crawled out of the bushes) and told him what was happening. I cannot TELL you how much I loved it when Wylie offered them his hospitality and Jamie was about to decline when Roger said "we'd be delighted" and "grabbed Jamie by the arm, steering him toward the shell-road before he could protest. There were times and places to be on your high horse, he supposed, but this wasn't one of them."

I LOVE the relationship that has formed between Roger and Jamie. They are polar opposites and sortof fit together to make one hell of a singing-warrior duo. Love love love it. Roger has gained so much confidence and is getting more and more comfortable telling Jamie what's what. And you can tell Jamie is happy, too... because Roger is taking initiative. Jamie is starting to see Roger as his equal... at least where the Lairding is concerned. The sword-fighting, not so much. ;)

Starsky and Hutch, indeed.

OK so I slept on it...

SPOILER ALERT: Dinna read unless you have finished Chapter 99 in  The Fiery Cross.

Havena read any of the comments from last night's post... because I wanted to let you all know how I feel after sleeping on it and thinking it through on my own. And now I can honestly say, I don't think Jamie has feelings for Laoghaire. I think he's being a typical man.  When he heard Laoghaire was getting down and dirty with someone at her house, he got jealous - not because the other man got to be with Laoghaire - but because the other man got to please Laoghaire; something he could never do. And in typical male fashion, his chest puffed out - he started beating on it whilst chanting the theme from Tarzan - and got his feathers in a dander because he wasn't "the best". Or at least "good" (in her eyes) in the sack. It's all about performance... and men all want to know they're performing well in the  bedroom.

I think what threw me was the dream. I think I thought "well if he's DREAMING about her - he must still want her!" when really the fact is that he was dreaming about not being able to please her. I am just happy they are NOWHERE NEAR Scotland at this point... because that could get ugly.

PS - I'm willing to bet there are no guys who read this blog - but if so, I would LOVE LOVE LOVE your opinion on this if you've actually read The Fiery Cross. And please don't take it personally; I could go on for hours about womenfolk's insecurities.

I feel sick...

SPOILER ALERT: Dinna read until you have finished chapter 99 in The Fiery Cross. 

I'm not sure I've felt this nauseated at a scene in a Diana Gabaldon novel since Claire came upon Jamie and John Grey in a loving embrace. It's a good thing Shannon, Jenn M and I agreed to stop at chapter 100 before our gathering tomorrow... because I don't think I could keep reading if I tried.

I don't know what's bothering me more: the fact that Jamie clearly has some kind of feelings left for Laoghaire... or the fact that he tried to do her in his sleep!!! And if he was as mechanical with Laoghaire as Claire said he was when he was asleep, maybe THAT'S why Laoghaire wasn't into his moves between the sheets.

I feel betrayed. I feel hurt. I feel GROSSED THE HELL OUT. He's thinking of Laoghaire!!! WHY??? He HATES Laoghaire! The woman has been extorting money from him for years! She tried to KILL him! She tried to KILL Claire! (Which he now KNOWS, thank you god). Yeah yeah yeah - he said he can't stand her, blah blah blah.... but boyfriend is waking his WIFE up at night by trying to DO her in his sleep while DREAMING she's THE WEE HO!!!!!!!!!!

I feel sick....

Here's an email I just sent to Tracey. Sick, sick and more sick. That's what I am... and it doesna seem to be getting any better. I canna even THINK of posting about how excited I am about Jenny's letter... or about how much selfish Bree annoys me... (you're right, Karen, she's not a "spoiled brat". But I do find her selfish at times - I'll explain later.) For now I'm just going to post this email and go to bed and sleep on it - and see if I feel any different in the AM...

I am sick. SO SO sick. Almost as bad as John Grey. I can't even read (which is good because I promised to stop after chapter 99 for our meeting tomorrow.)

Anyone but Laoghaire. I am so sad I could cry. Claire was VERY gracious and understanding. No WAY would I have been able to keep myself so calm and unfazed (at least in appearance; she was very fazed, at least at first. Ugh.)

I am just sick. Seriously. I cannot imagine what kind of lollypop sweetness you are going to pull out of your arse to defend Jamie Fraser right now. I am just sick.

I've been LOST!

Sorry all - crazy day and have been parked in front of my TV watching LOST for the past 3 HOURS. Like the old days before I discovered Diana... LOL

I'll be back Wednesday with a Bree post for sure. I've plenty to say, Lassies!

Someone send her back to The Gathering. LORD, THE GATHERING!

SPOILER ALERT: Dinna read unless you have read Chapter 92 in The Fiery Cross.

Bree is now COMMANDING men - in 18th century mountainous, Carolina (cleared) brush - on how to properly SKIN A MOTHERHUMPING BUFFALO.

I HAVE NOW SEEN IT ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am verklempt. Talk amongst yourselves. I'll give you a topic. Bree is a spoiled brat. DISCUSS!

The Union of the Snake

SPOILER ALERT: Dinna read unless you have finished chapter 90ish in THE FIERY CROSS.

OK so I'm home with a croupy 5 year old today and getting some reading done since he's on the couch watching The Backyardigans. This will be a quick post since I have to try my best at getting him to take a nap - but I have to update you all on where I am.

Poor Roger (I always call him that, now; "poor Roger") was hoping to get a little Bree-lurve until Jemmy decided he was going to wake up and kill the mood. Next thing you know Jamie comes-a-knockin' and tells Roger they've got to jet; there are "beasts" grazing just over the ridge. So off they go - find out they are buffalo - and are getting ready to kill them some supper... when BAM! Jamie gets bitten in the calf by a big-assed snake - about 4 feet long with the girth of Roger's wrist. DAMN. That's a big snake. Now... personally... I canna really blame yon snake... though I'd have aimed a little higher. (Oh c'mon... you know you were thinking the same thing. Admit it!)

Soooo.... Roger - my hero - cuts Jamie's leg (with some help from Jamie) and sucks out the venom. But they must have waited too long and Jamie starts turning 18 shades of red from head to toe... and is swelling like a prized haggis at The Gathering (LORDDDDD THE GATHERING!) And Jamie and Roger start discussing death and whether you can change the future (past?) and Culloden and Bonnie Prince Charlie and everything. It was a killer discussion that I'll have to read again at a later date. Anyway - they're trying to decide if Jamie is safe because he's not scheduled to die until 3 or 4 years from now. And Jamie - thinking he's dying - rattles off this whole barrage of instructions for "Poor Roger", involving many names of those on the Ridge, at Cross Creek, at Wylie's Landing, etc. And he says to tell Bree he's "glad of her" and to give Jemmy his sword... and doesn't say anything about Claire. And when Poor Roger asks him about Claire, Jamie tells him to tell her he "meant it".

Um - WTF?? Am I supposed to get that? Will I find out later? Am I a moron for not knowing precisely what that means? I feel so un-close to Jamie right now! Am I putting too much thought into it? Here is the email I just sent my sister/Outlander mentor, Tracey. I'll be back later, after I read more!!!

WHAT does he mean by "Tell Claire I meant it"??? Just that he loved her with all his heart and he "meant" every bit of their life together? Or is it something distinct and different that I'll find out later??? Right now Claire is pulling her medicinals out of her cabinet and praying she won't have to use the tools. (I canna even THINK about this. NOT at all.)

The Fiery Cross: Some of my Favorite Moments

SPOILER ALERT: Dinna read unless you've finished Chapter 88 in The Fiery Cross. 

I've been underlining and marking in the Kindle like a mad-woman lately.. and wanted to share some thoughts with you all...

How much did you love it when Roger regained slight contentiousness and Jamie said "You are alive. You are whole. All is well." I about LOST it when he said "You are whole". That is exactly what Roger would have been thinking as they were on the battlefield. He'd have come to - realized he's incapacitated - and thought "Oh god - what's wrong with me?" I found it very profound and moving that Jamie knew exactly what to say to calm him. God bless Jamie Fraser.

Again - loved it when Jamie said to the Governor: "As ye laid hands on my son." My son. MY SON. God that is so powerful after all they went through in Drums. The man beat the snot out of him and sold him to the Mohawks. And now is calling him his "son". Just very moving, in my opinion. 

How awesome is Claire? "Very carefully, I laid the limp, heavy little body on Roger's chest. Bree made a small movement, as though to catch the baby and stop him  sliding off-but Roger's arm moved up, stiff and slow, and folded across the sleeping child. Tinder, I thought, satisfied." There are no words.

Lovely Jamieisms: "Egg-sucking son of a porcupine!"  and "Turd-eating son of a flying tortoise".

Jamie to Bree: "I have been marrit near thiry years, and you less than two. What is it that ye think I dinna understand, lass?"  Um...I didn't know how to feel about this. I get his point. And I was moved that he says he's been married to Claire almost thirty years. But really? Really, Jamie? By my count I think it's more like 6 or 7 - and I think you're forgetting a certain someone who makes you send money to Scotland every once in a while. Just sayin'..

Totally verklempt: When Jamie told Bree that he spent 20 years wondering if his wife lived and how she and his child fared - and then touched both her and Claire at the same time while explaining that she'll be OK if Roger dies. Exhale. I just teared up thinking about it.

Claire/Roger: At one point, Diana points out that Claire feels like the dark forest could swallow her whole - and then says the exact same thing about Roger - and I thought "WOW! Total Claire/Roger parallel". And I started thinking about the many parallels between these two people. Both forfeited their lives' work - and everything they knew - to cross the stones and be with the one they loved. Both are always doing for others without asking much in return. Both are willing to accept new challenges and handle obstacles when they could be living a much kushier life in the 20th century. I have a tremendous amount of respect for both of these people and had to point that out.

Vomrific comment from Jamie: "And Brianna, bless her, killed a fine elk, just the other side of the river. A chest shot, but she brought it down - and cut the throat herself, though that's a dicey thing to do, and the beast's still thrashing." Ugh. WhatEVER!!!!!!

Orgasmic: "Jamie's head rose clear, a great maned creature looming over me, back arched in his extremity." Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ.

Carol is mush: "D'ye ken that the only time I am without pain is in your bed, Sassenach? When I take ye, when I lie in your arms - my wounds are healed, then, my scars forgotten."

Carol is worse mush: When Jamie tells Claire that his father took his mother's hair out of her plaits in her coffin... and how he moved her hair so it didn't cover his baby brother - and then moved it back again because the baby would be happier with her hair covering him. Wait - have to tear up a bit... OK I'm back. Let me just say that I have a son - he's 5. And a few times since he was about 2 I have tucked him in bed at night... and he has asked me to take my hair out of my ponytail, because he likes it long and he likes to touch it. My husband has never said that to me... so it's not like he learned it from him.  He just has it in his little heart that he likes mommy's hair down. So I don't have to tell you how that scene broke my heart...

Even more mush: When Jamie told Claire he was happy she had grey hair because it means she's aging and didn't die young like his mother. Sigh. Talk amongst yourselves...way too verklempt at this point to continue this line of discussion...

Cool Diana-ism: "The sky overhead curved low and dull as the inside of a pewter bowl." WTF??? WHERE does she come UP with this shit? (Said like Jason Lee) Is that not just a magnificent way to describe the sky? She has such a way with adjectives and description. I am so mortified because I just... don't. Don't believe me? Get this: I once went to a gallery showing of video "costumes" that belonged to John Taylor from Duran Duran. And someone was filming a video for John, himself, to watch afterward. I was so nervous, knowing he'd see it... that when I was asked what I thought of the suit he wore in the "Save a Prayer" video (my favorite, mind you) I moronically replied, "I had no idea it would be so... so... orange!" ORANGE??? That's all I had to say? Really Carol... really. It's just... embarrassing. And thus, why I WORSHIP Diana Gabaldon's talent for description.

Amusing Diana-ism: "There are few things deader than a large, dead pig."

OK - I am totally up to date now. I am off to read, lassies! More later!