Wednesday, July 16, 2014

"Why Do You Keep Calling Me Calvin?"

SPOILER ALERT:  Dinna read unless you have read parts 1 and 2 in Written in My Own Heart's Blood.

I was up reading at 3AM a few nights ago.  But I wasn't reading MOBY.



I was reading A LEAF ON THE WIND OF ALL HALLOWS!!!

I woke up - tossing and turning - with my mind racing about Roger and Buck...and Jerry.

This is me - trying to process all this time travel:


I am all kinds of confused.  AND LOVING IT.  And I know things will be revealed going forward...because they always are.  But I'm going over timelines...and my brain is negotiating with itself in a quest to piece it all together.  And don't bother telling me not to...and to just "go with it"...or some such silliness...because that is the way my brain works.  I missed my calling on "CSI Jersey Shore."

So here's the thing.  How did a woman on a farm in North Umbria have Jerry's dog tags if Jack-friggin-RANDALL had them Inverness in MOBY??  And handed them to Brian Fraser who handed them to Roger.  But Roger was WITH Jerry Mackenzie in North Umbria when the aforementioned farmer's wife had them there.  (UNLESS the man with dark hair and bright green eyes who told Jerry he loved him WASNA ROGER???)  So now I'm all KINDS of wondering if Roger is going to go through the stones with Buck AGAIN and find Jerry or what?

Frank, during his brief trip to
the 18th century (in my dreams.) 
AND AND AND...as we were discussing in MOP Chat last night; how did Frank's letter get into a desk at Lallybroch?!?  Riddle me THAT!  (Kidding - dinna tell me, please. Nae spoilers, aye?!) I suppose I'll just have to keep reading to find out.

AND Poor Jem.  I can handle a lot, y'all...but I canna handle the back and forth with little Jem being hunted by Rob Cameron.  And that story in the letter by Frank???  That exactly why they want Jem.  I thought it was about time travel...but if that were the case, they could have taken Bree.  They want Jem because they think he's going to rule Scotland.  (TELL me that wasn't a bomb dropper when you read THAT little tidbit.  WOW.  Canna wait to see what happens with THAT storyline.)

A few things:

- DOUGAL EFFING MACfrigginKENZIE for the love of all that's holy!!!  Yet another "SHUT UP!!!" moment in this series.  I loved every second of his visit with his twin Roger.  And comments like "feeling a state of bemused horror" just make me a) giggle, b) TOTALLY feel the scene and c) realize I'm feeling the same EXACT thing at seeing Dougal again!!!

- That letter Frank wrote to Bree.  Tell me I didn't cry - right there in my bed at 3AM - when he signed it "Dad".  OMG I cried an ocean.  I am telling you...Tobias Menzies' casting - coupled with my "Leaf on the Wind of All Hallows" read a couple years back (was it that long ago??) - has softened me to Frank BIG time.

"Take your damned hands off her."
And don't eff this UP, Roger!!!
- ROGER HELD BLACK JACK'S HANDS AND PRAYED OVER HIM.  (insert my gobsmacked face here)  What in the name of all that's holy.  I am living in TERROR that Roger is going to mess things up for Jamie and Claire.  What if Randall falls for ROGER?!?  What if that teeny prayer session makes Black Jack find God and throw away his wicked ways??  What if George McFly doesn't get the girl?  (Sorry - had to.)  SO MANY WHAT IFS!!!!!

- Bree is takin' the bairns and getting the heck outta dodge.  And putting herself right smack into the middle of the American Revolution in Phila-delphi-A.  Oy.  I suppose Frank is right; the safest place is the past.

But what about HAROLD ROGER?!?



What is that poor soul going to DO??  Shiz - he's OLDER THAN effing JAMIE in 1738!!!  It's not like he can WAIT FOR BREE or something!!  Boyfriend's going to have to get his ass back to the 80s (like all the clothing designers seem to have done recently; lorddddddddd the stripes)...read Bree's note...and then get his ass back to 1778 Philly.  OMG this book is so brills I don't know what to DO with myself!!!  Time travel RULES!!!

OK on to Part 3.  Wish me luck!!!

Tuesday, July 15, 2014

MOP Talks MOBY!!!

Check us out as we discuss Parts 1 & 2 of Written in My Own Heart's Blood!

  

MOP's TOBIAS TUESDAY!!!


Monday, July 14, 2014

MOP CHAT TONIGHT!

MOP Outlander Chat Tonight  at 9PM Eastern.  

Chat rules for this evening's MOBY discussion: 

The first half of tonight's discussion will be about PARTS 1&2 ONLY!

The second half of tonight's discussion will include THE ENTIRE BOOK.  

LET'S DISCUSS!!! 

Tuesday, July 8, 2014

MOP's TOBIAS TUESDAY!

Just in under the wire because Tracey and I are out and about and up to no good! ;)


Friday, July 4, 2014

Time Keeps on Slipping, Slipping, Slipping...

SPOILER ALERT:  Dinna read unless you've read chapter 31 in Written in My Own Heart's Blood.

If the house is-a-rockin'...
Jamie and Claire
Sittin' in a Tree
K-I-S-S-I-N-G
First comes love...
Then comes marriage...

Then comes schtupping in a potting shed!!!

DAMN, boyfriend...you sure know how to make an entrance!!!  For a minute there, I thought I was back in Lazarevo!! (Bronze Horseman by Paullina Simons reference.  If you havena read it...GET ON IT.)

And isn't it just like Miss Herself to sneak that up on us like a rainstorm in the desert.  (Better put an extra S on that because it's more like DESSERT!)

Elfreth's Alley.  Recognize. 
Meanwhile...back at the townhouse (or "row house" {pronounced row-hayus} as we Philadelphians like to say), has Jenny left Hal alone?  Or will she shank him when Ian and Rachel go to visit Marsali at the print shop?  And, um, is Fergus even at the print shop?  I don't even remember.  I must do some searchin' through Echo when I get a few minutes so I can get up to speed on Fergus's whereabouts.

So where am I now?  Bree just found Jem.  Thank GOD.  I was on the edge of my seat for that little roller coaster ride.  That poor kid.  He is NINE!  Just like my own son.  I swear, I was tearing up in the salon chair yesterday during my partial foil!  That poor soul was just wandering around IN THE DARK (sung like Billy Squier).  I was a puddle the entire time I was waiting for my vanilla creme glaze to kick in.  Can you imagine??  That little guy dealing with those crazy-assed machines...and the stairs...and the possibility of getting sucked back to the 18th century.  What a ride!!!

See Rob rub.  Rub, Rob, rub. 
That Rob Cameron is a douche of epic proportions.  I hope Bree leaves him in her hidey hole for the entire book and makes him rub the lotion on his skin.  Shit, I'll buy Diana Gabaldon a poodle named Precious if that happens.

And Roger.  Poor Roger.  :(  Oh I am sick for him.  He is - and always will be - Job.  I went from "Ugh...I already read about Roger and Buck trekking across the countryside and trying to get back" to "Holy shit, Roger's the most interesting thing in this friggin  book!  And that's saying something because every storyline is on fire!!"

Brian Fraser.  BRIAN FUCKING FRASER.  I shat my pants on the spot when he appeared at the friggin door.  Diana Gabaldon, man.  She is the shiz!!!  WHAT a gift for us!!!  I wanted to stand up in the salon chair and go "WUH WUH WUH" with my fist like Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman.  And Janet Jenny.  Lorddddddd 15 year old Jenny.  And I was calculating in my head like a crazy person while reading that...FEVERISHLY trying to figure out how old Jamie was and WHERE he was and if he was a couple years older or younger than Jenny.  (Memory.  It's not just for breakfast anymore!)

Brian WHAT?!?
Actually - when we first saw Brian, I was wondering if Jamie was going to come toddling to the front door...and I'm kindof glad he didn't.  My heart would not have been able to handle that at_all.  I would have run screaming from The Style Room, yelling "Help me, help me, Jesus, Bride and the saints!!!" and scared the crap out of the lady next door in the bakery.

OK - enough of my rambling.  Later, y'all.  I have to go read.

Post Scriptum:  Isn't DG a sly one with flipping back and forth between worlds?  I had forgotten how maddening, yet delicious it is when you get SO into one storyline...find yourself in the other world and think "Oh crap"...and a few paragraphs later are completely and utterly immersed in THAT world...and never want to leave.

Happy Fourth of July!

IN CONGRESS, July 4, 1776.
The unanimous Declaration of the thirteen united States of America,
When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.
We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.–That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, –That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security.–Such has been the patient sufferance of these Colonies; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Government. The history of the present King of Great Britain is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny over these States. To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.
He has refused his Assent to Laws, the most wholesome and necessary for the public good.
He has forbidden his Governors to pass Laws of immediate and pressing importance, unless suspended in their operation till his Assent should be obtained; and when so suspended, he has utterly neglected to attend to them.
He has refused to pass other Laws for the accommodation of large districts of people, unless those people would relinquish the right of Representation in the Legislature, a right inestimable to them and formidable to tyrants only.
He has called together legislative bodies at places unusual, uncomfortable, and distant from the depository of their public Records, for the sole purpose of fatiguing them into compliance with his measures.
He has dissolved Representative Houses repeatedly, for opposing with manly firmness his invasions on the rights of the people.
He has refused for a long time, after such dissolutions, to cause others to be elected; whereby the Legislative powers, incapable of Annihilation, have returned to the People at large for their exercise; the State remaining in the mean time exposed to all the dangers of invasion from without, and convulsions within.
He has endeavoured to prevent the population of these States; for that purpose obstructing the Laws for Naturalization of Foreigners; refusing to pass others to encourage their migrations hither, and raising the conditions of new Appropriations of Lands.
He has obstructed the Administration of Justice, by refusing his Assent to Laws for establishing Judiciary powers.
He has made Judges dependent on his Will alone, for the tenure of their offices, and the amount and payment of their salaries.
He has erected a multitude of New Offices, and sent hither swarms of Officers to harrass our people, and eat out their substance.
He has kept among us, in times of peace, Standing Armies without the Consent of our legislatures.
He has affected to render the Military independent of and superior to the Civil power.
He has combined with others to subject us to a jurisdiction foreign to our constitution, and unacknowledged by our laws; giving his Assent to their Acts of pretended Legislation:
For Quartering large bodies of armed troops among us:
For protecting them, by a mock Trial, from punishment for any Murders which they should commit on the Inhabitants of these States:
For cutting off our Trade with all parts of the world:
For imposing Taxes on us without our Consent:
For depriving us in many cases, of the benefits of Trial by Jury:
For transporting us beyond Seas to be tried for pretended offences
For abolishing the free System of English Laws in a neighbouring Province, establishing therein an Arbitrary government, and enlarging its Boundaries so as to render it at once an example and fit instrument for introducing the same absolute rule into these Colonies:
For taking away our Charters, abolishing our most valuable Laws, and altering fundamentally the Forms of our Governments:
For suspending our own Legislatures, and declaring themselves invested with power to legislate for us in all cases whatsoever.
He has abdicated Government here, by declaring us out of his Protection and waging War against us.
He has plundered our seas, ravaged our Coasts, burnt our towns, and destroyed the lives of our people.
He is at this time transporting large Armies of foreign Mercenaries to compleat the works of death, desolation and tyranny, already begun with circumstances of Cruelty & perfidy scarcely paralleled in the most barbarous ages, and totally unworthy the Head of a civilized nation.
He has constrained our fellow Citizens taken Captive on the high Seas to bear Arms against their Country, to become the executioners of their friends and Brethren, or to fall themselves by their Hands.
He has excited domestic insurrections amongst us, and has endeavoured to bring on the inhabitants of our frontiers, the merciless Indian Savages, whose known rule of warfare, is an undistinguished destruction of all ages, sexes and conditions.
In every stage of these Oppressions We have Petitioned for Redress in the most humble terms: Our repeated Petitions have been answered only by repeated injury. A Prince whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a Tyrant, is unfit to be the ruler of a free people.
Nor have We been wanting in attentions to our Brittish brethren. We have warned them from time to time of attempts by their legislature to extend an unwarrantable jurisdiction over us. We have reminded them of the circumstances of our emigration and settlement here. We have appealed to their native justice and magnanimity, and we have conjured them by the ties of our common kindred to disavow these usurpations, which, would inevitably interrupt our connections and correspondence. They too have been deaf to the voice of justice and of consanguinity. We must, therefore, acquiesce in the necessity, which denounces our Separation, and hold them, as we hold the rest of mankind, Enemies in War, in Peace Friends.
We, therefore, the Representatives of the united States of America, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Colonies, solemnly publish and declare, That these United Colonies are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent States; that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the British Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of Great Britain, is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that as Free and Independent States, they have full Power to levy War, conclude Peace, contract Alliances, establish Commerce, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent States may of right do. And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes and our sacred Honor.

Sunday, June 29, 2014

Over the River (Near Matson's Ford) and Through the Woods (Between Valley Forge and Philadelphia) to Mother Claire's House We Go!

SPOILER ALERT:  I have read 21 Chapters in Written in My Own Heart's Blood.  

Gather 'round now, chitlins, 'cuz mama's got a lot to talk about, mmmkayyy?  Talk amongst yourselves...I'll give you a topic:  St. John's Wort is neither a saint, nor a wart.  Discuss!!

First of all...  Ooooh wheee!  That Willy is all kinds of messed up in the head right now, is he not?!  Boyfriend's walkin' around...all disheveled...trying to keep up this facade of being rich-folk...when in all actuality, hereditarily speaking, he doesna have a pot to pee in!  (Unless it's the lady Arabella-Jane's chamber pot...and he's too highfalutin to peep on top of her low-class peeps so soon after she peeped 'em!)

The story of Willie's life.
OK so seriously.  Here's a guy who has been told - his entire life - that he's special.  And rich.  And all of a sudden...BAM!  He ain't worth a dime - figuratively AND literally.  It's got to be completely overwhelming and all-encompassing, no?  You really have to put yourself in William's position to understand why I feel such empathy for him.  His entire world is a lie.  His mother is not his mother.  His father is not his father.  And the very people who raised him and were supposed to protect him have been lying to him all those years.
You think I've got it bad...you
should see the Earl of Ellesmere!
This poor kid is a ticking time bomb!!  He makes Dallas in The Outsiders look like he's out for a stroll at the convenience store parking lot!!  I don't blame him one bit for hating Jamie Fraser.  (Nor does Jamie, I might add.)

But Ian?  WEE Ian?!?  Dude...you better back the eff UP.  I will NOT tolerate you hauling off and hitting Ian in the mouth...and then being all snooty and righteous and telling the officers HE started it.  Well nanny nanny noo noo, ya poor bugger.  I don't feel the least bit sorry for ya when ye act like a child.  Hell, my 9 year old wouldn't play THAT blame game...and he invented it!  His sister does everything wrong..."I don't know" leaves his stuff around the house...and "somebody" moved it when he can't find it.  Believe me - I know a good bit about acting like a child...and William's doing a rip-roarin' job.

Hey Rachel...
Want a piece of this?
And how about Miss Rachel being all bedroom eyed over Ian's fine arse in the woods...or his johnson private parts under the loin cloth breechclout for that matter!  Girlfriend is in HEAT!  I love it!  Quaker or no, she knows one fine piece of homely, skinny ass when she sees it!  I found it totally bittersweet when Herself said Rachel just liked to talk to Ian...and look at his face (so paraphrasing but you get the gist).  I love that he's found someone who's so gaga over him that she just wants to stare at him.  But it made me sad to think of his face being tattooed forever...and her probably being sad for him, even though he's not sad for himself.  I think those tattoos would probably make me love him more...because it would make him seem vulnerable in a way.  (And we all know how much Carol loves vulnerability in her fictional men!)

Honestly, it kills me to not know what Wee Ian looks like.  I wish someone would sit Diana Gabaldon down with a sketch artist and make her draw him for us.  I've always seen him like Joe Mazzello...but I'd love to know how she sees him (along with sooo many other characters!)

It also pains me to hear Ian rehashing and reliving "Emily" in his mind while filling Rachel in on all the sordid deets.  Ahem...cough bloort coughhhh!!!

Excuse me, I just threw up in my mouth a little at the mere thought of that awful woman.

Why, yes!  That is my nephew who
thinks I'm dead.  Thanks for asking!
OK getting back to the matter at hand.  Jamie...cruising along Lancaster Avenue  Route 30  Lincoln Highway  the main road to Philadelphia, on someone's wagon.  Like an even hotter, red-heided Pa Ingalls - trying to get back to Claire...so she can tell him just what she was thinking about, sleeping with Lord John, which he finds somewhat Mary McNabbesque.  (Not sure I remember him meeting back up with Mary for a little third base after that...a la Claire and Lord John...but why split hand jobs hairs).  I have to be honest - I don't really want Claire to get off that easy (pun intended!)  but - again - it's almost easier to write it off than spend a ton of time dwelling on it...just like the situation with Jenny.

So here's Jamie, riding along...and there is FRIGGIN IAN WHO THINKS HE'S DEAD walking alongside of him!!!  Oh holy hell - I sat right up (in my lounge chair by the pool where I was ignoring my family all afternoon) and said "No WAY!!!!!"  (I can't WAIT until we see Ian realize Jenny's still alive, too!!)  And poor Rachel is running alongside the gaggle of lobsterbacks...trying to keep track of where they're taking her Scottish Mohawk man.  (Um, did Ian not tell you to go to Mother Claire and help him get out of this mess?  So whatcha doin' still here, missy??) And then SHE looks at Jamie and almost falls the hell over...which is beyond deliciously fun, no?!

And when Jamie blackmails Willie and thinks to himself "Oh shiz - I couldna even take him!"???  Oh that just did it for me.  I am as entrenched as anyone can be at this point.

Yup.  I'm knee-deep in NEW GABALDON!!!  

It's like Christmas morning when you've unwrapped all your new toys and you love everything...but you've only tested out a few so far and they couldn't tear you away from these new toys if they tried.

A few quick points:  

- Kindof glad we have't heard from Mother Claire and Hal in the last few chapters.  I needed a break from Hal's asthma and Claire's ministrations.

- Love the complexity of the situation with Ian and Rachel...and Denny and Dottie for that matter.  Religious tradition and its upheaval in one's life always spices up a storyline.

- All y'all have no iDEA how juicy all this Philadelphia burbs stuff is.  Valley Forge...Matson's Ford (which is current day Conshohocken, y'all)...Brandywine...Jethro Woodbine (as in Woodbine Avenue)...it's like Diana Gabaldon was in my class at St. Norbert's and went on all the field trips with me.  Something tells me she didn't sing quite as loudly and obnoxiously as I did on the bus rides there and back...but I digress.

- Jamie has always, ALWAYS acted like a father to William.  So many instances of him showing him tough love...just like a good dad would do.  It warms my heart.  Jamie just walked up to him - grabbed him by the ear (OK not the ear but you know what I mean) - and told him what he was going to do...because it was the RIGHT thing to do.  I have such love for this sad little non-relationship, I canna conTAIN myself.  I can only hope they forge some type of bond going forward, after Willie stops feeling sorry for himself and doing hookers because they insist upon it while being saved from a good buggery.

- Lord John.  Lorddddddd Lord John.  Oy.  That dumb shit has now been taken by yet another band of rebels.  (Oh hush - you know I love him.  He's like family.  That's what family does.  We make fun of each other.  Tracey calls me dumb all the time.)  At least this time he's got the smarts enough to lie about his identity...and tone down the hoity toity English accent.  I can only hope for his sake that he left his sarcastic quips back at camp with Den and Dot.

I know I'm forgetting a ton of good stuff but that's what happens when you read, read, read...which I have been doing today.  I am getting to that point where I have no choice but to read, no matter how hard to try to ration my NG (New Gabaldon).

The force is strong with this one, my friends.