Wednesday, February 3, 2010

I feel sick...

SPOILER ALERT: Dinna read until you have finished chapter 99 in The Fiery Cross. 

I'm not sure I've felt this nauseated at a scene in a Diana Gabaldon novel since Claire came upon Jamie and John Grey in a loving embrace. It's a good thing Shannon, Jenn M and I agreed to stop at chapter 100 before our gathering tomorrow... because I don't think I could keep reading if I tried.

I don't know what's bothering me more: the fact that Jamie clearly has some kind of feelings left for Laoghaire... or the fact that he tried to do her in his sleep!!! And if he was as mechanical with Laoghaire as Claire said he was when he was asleep, maybe THAT'S why Laoghaire wasn't into his moves between the sheets.

I feel betrayed. I feel hurt. I feel GROSSED THE HELL OUT. He's thinking of Laoghaire!!! WHY??? He HATES Laoghaire! The woman has been extorting money from him for years! She tried to KILL him! She tried to KILL Claire! (Which he now KNOWS, thank you god). Yeah yeah yeah - he said he can't stand her, blah blah blah.... but boyfriend is waking his WIFE up at night by trying to DO her in his sleep while DREAMING she's THE WEE HO!!!!!!!!!!

I feel sick....

Here's an email I just sent to Tracey. Sick, sick and more sick. That's what I am... and it doesna seem to be getting any better. I canna even THINK of posting about how excited I am about Jenny's letter... or about how much selfish Bree annoys me... (you're right, Karen, she's not a "spoiled brat". But I do find her selfish at times - I'll explain later.) For now I'm just going to post this email and go to bed and sleep on it - and see if I feel any different in the AM...

I am sick. SO SO sick. Almost as bad as John Grey. I can't even read (which is good because I promised to stop after chapter 99 for our meeting tomorrow.)

Anyone but Laoghaire. I am so sad I could cry. Claire was VERY gracious and understanding. No WAY would I have been able to keep myself so calm and unfazed (at least in appearance; she was very fazed, at least at first. Ugh.)

I am just sick. Seriously. I cannot imagine what kind of lollypop sweetness you are going to pull out of your arse to defend Jamie Fraser right now. I am just sick.

15 comments:

  1. Well, you have hit upon Dumbass Jamie Move #3 of Fiery Cross. And I'm assuming you read the ENTIRE chapter and didn't just stop when he grabs his clothes and leaves, right?

    OK. I will say that during the, um, incident itself I was equally disgusted and angry with Jamie. But I do that he ended up acquitting himself to a large degree, and that scene has become one of my favorites in the entire book. Here's why: You (Carol), me, Jenn, Shannon, or any of our AMAZING blog reader/commenters were not the people most disgusted by the incident. Claire was not the one most disgusted by the incident. The fact is that Jamie himself was more disgusted and ashamed and embarrassed and frustrated and baffled by what he had done than anyone else could be, and that helped me to forgive him.

    Once again, because of DG's stellar writing and descriptions of what's going on in Jamie's head, I was able to see through Claire's eyes and really experience the feelings that Jamie was trying to convey.

    You know what that scene sort of reminded me of? The scene in When Harry Met Sally where Sally realizes that her old bf broke up with her not b/c he didn't want to get married, but b/c he didn't want to marry HER. The scene once again showed us Jamie confronting and dealing his own insecurities. It showed he's not perfect, but HUMAN, and in a relatable way. And I think Claire (and me) was able to forgive him b/c HE was able to own up to how he was feeling. By the end, I was loving that scene, really.

    I also think that it's an important scene in terms of Jamie coming to terms with a lot of memories and events from his past. I think we're going to be seeing a lot more of that theme in the next two books.

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  2. Oh, and I almost missed the part about Jenny's letter. !!!!!!!!!!!!!

    That was the one part of Fiery Cross that made me cry.

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  3. I am SO HAPPY you're the only one who commented... because I was afraid there would be a bunch of people saying "Carol - you are so WRONG!" LOL I posted again about the situation.. and plan to post again today/tonight, too. Lots to discuss regarding Jenny's letter... and Roger's mother (heartbreaking) and of course, Super Girl...

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  4. PS - That's doesn't mean I don't want comments! I was just happy I didn't blow off anyone else's comments before blogging again. I totally avoided the comments like the plague before I could get my (newfound) feelings out in a blog post!!

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  5. Carol: You aren't wrong. :) I remember when I read that particular scene, my feelings and reaction were very similar to yours. But the longer I thought about it, I can to the same realization that Tracey did. I'm sure we've all had similar feelings at one time or another. Jamie doesn't necessarily WANT Leghair... but he's bothered that Leghair (who didn't want him once she got him) is getting it on with someone else. I'm sure that was a massive hit to his male ego--Jamie being the manly man that he is.

    Besides... who out there has the right to tell you that your feelings are wrong? :)

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  6. I do think this is one of the most humanizing scenes that Jamie has. I appreciate that DG writes him as a REAL person; as wonderful as he is, he is not simply an unrealistic ideal. He has his flaws, and he and Claire have to work through them.

    If anything, I think this was also an interesting move on DG's part to make Laoghaire not just a villain, but a flawed, human being who takes advantage of another person in order to maintain some minute bit of control over her situation. Do I like Laoghaire? No. But I think DG does an excellent job of explaining how/why Jamies could/would have turned to her in Claire's absence.

    P.S. I think Tracey's response is spot-on.

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  7. Shannon thinks Laoghaire is with a woman; not a man. That is a tremendous prediction, whether it's correct or not. I am really looking forward to finding out what happens, lassies. I just hope it comes up again soon! I'm on Chapter 104 in The Fiery Cross and plan on starting A Breath of Snow and Ashes this weekend when I'm finished. Squeee!

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  8. Oh I like the idea of Laoighaire being with a woman- might explain a thing or two. Then again I want them to be shot of her and that can't happen unless she is marritt.

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    1. LOL Fifi. I love that others say things like "marritt" and not just me. ;)

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  9. I was also troubled by this scene, BUT (and not that I think the Leery-dream-sex was in any way consciously deliberate on Jamie's part) it pales in comparison to Claire's unending solicitude for future-Frank. Don't get me started: Jamie can't fry BJR's ass because it might kill off future-Frank; Claire's delight in discovering it was saintly Alex Randall who is Frank's actual ancestor; and her obsession with that GD gold wedding ring!!! Puh-leeeze!!! All this to protect a misogynistic, cheating, racist, elitist who tried to take her daughter away from her, Enough already!!! Account paid in full - and closed!!

    BTW - the Jamie Leery-sex-dream may be the first of many interesting Jamie dreams-nightmares-visions to come in the latter books! Love 'em! Who said Claire was the only one with "special" gifts!!

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    1. Oooh Andrea girlllll...where were you when I hatin'-on Frank like you are right now?? We would have gotten along splendidly! ;) GREAT POINT about the dream. I always felt that way about Jamie; the man's got his own gifts!!

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    2. Carol, Darlin' -

      I think we'd get on splendidly NOW ... and going forward!

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  10. I know this is SO crazy but I'm so afraid to read this book for fear that Jamie is going to do something unJamielike....like this. I'm in tears and I'm just reading the posts!! I'll have a breakdown if I read the book. Heaven help me!

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    1. That is NOT crazy in the slightest. BUT - ye have to. You know how Diana is. There are sooooo many details I'm not even skimming the surface of...that you *have* to discover on your own. So hunker down, open that book, and READDDDDD! Lorddddddd read. LOL And then come back and we'll discuss. :)

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  11. I know this is a while ago, but I feel the exact same way as most people posting here. I too am afraid but during season 2. I had such butterfly's with each episode bc I couldn't stand the distance between Jamie and Claire. It was heartbreaking as is this whole thing with Leoghaire. I know I am too emotionally attached to this story as if it's happening to me. Never before. Can't figure it out except it must touch a nerve. Apparently I am not alone. G-d help me when S3 begins.

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