Tuesday, March 9, 2010

A Breath of Snow and Asses

SPOILER ALERT: Dinna read unless you've read chapter 73 in A BREATH OF SNOW AND ASHES. 

OK first question: Is everybody just doing everybody on the Ridge and in River Run these days? That's what I'm feeling like.

Duncan: I canna blame him. Not one bit. IF (and that's a big "if") he's telling the truth about being impotent since he was young and that something suddenly came up when Phaedre was cleaning up his butter. No pun intended. 

Lizzie:  LIZZIE YOU IGNORANT HO-BAG! Who knew she had it in her?! No pun intended. What is she, Malva?! And she did BOTH of them?!? BLECH. I still havena finished the chapter so I'm still a little confused on what exactly transpired. Did they mean to trick her - or did they think she knew the diff? Not really sure at this point. All I know is she's got a bun in the oven and doesna know which Beardsley put it there. Um, ew.

And might I say, I'm sick of Jocasta. I really am. I dinna think I care too much about her welfare. Is that mean? I think I'm just starting to really classify her with her brothers and think "ick". I REALLY wonder more and more about what Ellen was like, coming from a horrible family like that. 

OK - SO - on to more important things. Ian. SOBBBB! Poor baby. I cried for him when he was getting all philosophical about his daughter - and when Bree prayed to Frank to take care of her. Poor souls - both of them. What a poignant scene. I also started to really feel for Bree - and the loss of the only  father she'd ever known until she went through the stones and found Jamie. Even if I didna like him all that much, Frank was her world - and now he's gone. I almost wish he'd somehow show up on the Ridge. I really do. That would rightly muck things up for sure. My god IMAGINE the fun!!! Oh god - that meeting. Jamie vs. Frank. THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!!!

And WHO is Ian going to marry NOW that Lizzie has seen fit to roll in the hay with the Beardsleys and get herself knocked up? OH and how about the admission that she almost did the nasty with Bobby Higgins! WOWWY MCWOW! I didna even know they kissed - let alone came close to fornicating.

DAMN. Life on the Ridge is pretty interesting, ken?


  1. Re: Lizzie--"what is she, Malva?" Made me laugh right the hell out loud.

    That Lizzie/Beardsley stuff is some FREAK-ASS-SHITE. As Bill Murray says in Tootsie, "That is one. Nutty. Hospital." Seriously, I read that and was like, "Listen Jamie/Ian--NOT ONE WORD about how effed up people in the future are. Y'all are doing quite well in the freak business yeselves."

    Re: Ian/Bree: Sobbed my way through pretty much the entire Emily chapter. I wanted to reach through the pages and hug Ian myself. Good GOD what a poor tormented soul. D'ye think it's because of the Mohawk--or would he have felt this lost even if he had stayed on the Ridge? I left that chapter feeling for him SO much.

    And go Miss Bree! I thought she did right well by her cuz--said the right things--direct when she needed to be, comforting when she needed to be. The whole "Daddy please take care of Ian's little girl"--SOBSOBSOB. I swear, IMO that chapter was maybe the most spiritually moving chapter in these books since Brother Anselm (sp??) counseled Claire in Outlander.

    And let's talk about the awesomeness of Bree/Ian's discussions about toilet paper and chocolate. I could SEE Ian's reactions in my head as I read it--LOVED all of it.

  2. I want Ian to go through the stones. I told you that. I truly do. I think he could handle it. Jamie? Not so much. But Ian - he's such an adventurer and he's not happy unless things are moving and shaking around him. I know he loves the peaceful qualities of nature... but he'd adapt. He could move to California and go hiking with the stars. ;)

    1. Yes, Ian in modern times. He would be fine, tats across the face no problem here. He is charming,funny and he is Jamie's nephew,what a package.

  3. PS - Tracey I'm shocked you didna mention "something suddenly came up". That was thrown in there for you, especially.

  4. Need to use the expression in the context for which it was intended. As in, "Sorry Ian," said the Indian grandma. "Emily can't be married to you anymore. Something suddenly came up."

  5. And now you've reached possibly the sketchiest part of the series. The whole Lizzie/Beardsley twins still gets my roomie worked up! Oh, and it doesn't get any more normal from here on out...it gets stranger...as if that was possible!

  6. well they didn't have tv what else were they going to do!

  7. Tracey - SO FUNNY I almost wet myself (which isna hard, ask Whoopie)

    Jo - UGH - weirder?? I dinna know if I can take it! LOL

    Shannon - SO TRUE! It was either that or help Mrs. Bug churn more butter!!

  8. I love Lizzie, picturing her like a little wan Dakota Fanning/Amanda Seyfriend type. But this FREAKED me out! I mean, she exhorted bree to take her to the states to avoid sexual perversion, right? And then she ended up doing it with the beardsleys - whom I picture like a weird tall Max from Where the Wild Things Are - and did they do it at once? Threesome style?
    And, can I just say, I don't ever want frank to show up anywhere. I appreciate that Bree loved him. I LOVE it that she loves him. I never would have wanted to believe claire would end up with a man who wouldn't love her daughter. I can understand frank's cheating, all things considered, and it's enough that Bree adores him.
    But I don't ever want him to show up! It's creepy enough when his ghost makes it through, waking Claire the morning of Bree's wedding, etc... The fact is, against Jamie, most men are found wanting. I never want Framk to lose more than he did already due to Claire and Jamie's meeting - i.e., everything. And really, if it's a face off between them (and I weirdly dont see it that way) it's no contest!

  9. Sirena: LOL re: threesomes. I remember reading that part, thinking the same thing, like "hmm...this is ONE area DG has NOT explored thus far!"

  10. If it was set in the year 2010, Lizzie would be living with Hugh in that big ol'Mansion with a cotton ball on her bum. That scene and the whacked-out ridiculousness come gave me the willies. I pictured the Beardsleys as those weird, gray, swaying plankton blobs in the Little Mermaid...they get everywhere.. ;) AGH.

  11. I actually saw the Beardsley Lizzie thing as very innocent and loving. They absolutely adore and care for her. They are twins in the truest sense sharing everything including the love of one woman. I think it quite sweet. I was glad DG put this in the book, shake things up a bit, do the unexpected, don't be predictable. I loved how Claire and Jamie didn't overly judge the situation, but gave support.

  12. I can kind of see that, Cathy! The Beardsleys are a little out there bc of their upbringing (or lack thereof) and I think Lizzie may be a little "teched" (not in a hostile Malva way) bc of the fevers, so I can kind of see that. And I do love it when DG shakes it up :-)

  13. What freaks me out the MOST is that I'm starting to accept the Lizzie/Beardsleys thing and think of it as NORMAL! I love when they're just sitting around doing needlework, talking about their husbands and she's like "Oh yeah - poor Jo and Kez were hunting in the rain for like 6 hours yesterday. I made them their dinners (deer and rabbit stew, repsectively), gave them backrubs and we went to bed. And we all slept great, so that was cool."

  14. I bawled reading the Emily chapter too. And finally to see Bree in a different light. Ahhh

  15. Frank can't show up on the Ridge, nor anywhere else in Jamie's time. Why? Because if Gabaldon hasn't already mixed in enough loose ends and tension, there still always needs to be that tension between Jamie and Frank. Remember in Outlander when Jamie says, "I wish I could have fought him for you,"? Well, it's really Claire's fight.

    I was shocked about Lizzy, too! Yet, somehow, I'm taking it in mental strides and accepting that Lizzy may have come out on the good end of it compared to everyone on the Ridge (except Claire and Bree). She has TWO men to love her and take care of her. Since we all know that Jamie is THE baddest badass in all of Badassery, with Roger scrambling and hurtling to catch up, it's gonna take TWO men to equal one great husband from here on out (well, until Ian lays it on someone).